My first instinct with food is to go all hardcore, eat only the purest, most sustaining ingredients. I think it’s an underlying urgency to combat our generally toxic food system, environment, and most of all, my poor dietary choices in the past. Pregnancy only makes me more of a fanatic. Seems I have to eat my opinions though, since I really haven’t been consistent recently…
Delighted with our third pregnancy, I launched into the first trimester with high hopes of low weight gain since I have been eating Trim Healthy Mama style. Most TH mamas have glowing reports of happier, trimmer pregnancies and while I hadn’t lost those last 7 pounds of “vanity weight” I looked forward to a wholly different pregnancy from my last which was fraught with depression and rather rapid weight gain.
Four weeks in and I felt completely normal, five weeks and I found myself hit with morning sickness unlike anything I’d experienced with Eden and Elliot. It began with a middle-of-the-night blast that sent me flying to bathroom in anticipation of losing my dinner. While that didn’t happen, it did signal the beginning of 6 more long weeks of eating for survival.
Suddenly, if I didn’t eat something with protein every 2 1/2 hours I turned into a desperate, stomach-turned child searching for something to calm my belly. I felt my metabolism accelerate like never before, I didn’t gain a pound but I had to eat more often than ever. Eating became a double-edged sword of necessity and churning repulsion. All my super-food THM favorites like skinny chocolate, sauteed, salmon, my beloved bowls of fresh-picked organic greens, stevia, extra-creamy foods became repellent to me.
I was exhausted as well, with two naps a day I could still hardly keep moving through the, day. My emotions were slightly haywire and my poor, patient husband came home to a hostile wife more days than I care to remember. My precious Eden and Elliot also had to deal with a self-absorbed, impatient mama…
So I, (me, Miss Gourmet, Purist etc!) ate low-carb “franken-food” wraps stuck together with a mass of non-organic peanut butter and butter, oatmeal, Trim Healthy Mama pancakes (unsoaked oats!), conventionally-raised grilled chicken from Target, lots of Greek yogurt, and as much fruit, especially strawberries, as I could get my hands on. My meals got a ton lazier, I stopped soaking my beans and bought canned, I bought white rice so Elliot would eat a bowlful without coaxing. I bought popsicles, boxed cereal, breaded chicken fingers, and frozen french fries for the tots, multiple times! I cooked less in gerneral but still tried to have supper on the table for Paul, never sure if the results were as disgusting as I felt it must be.
My cravings ran the gamut of every white, carby, fluffy, chewy food you could imagine, pizza, doughnuts, cookie bars, pasta! I did give in to my pickle craving and felt so disciplined when I resorted to THM-based meals and snacks again and again. I answered my red meat craving happily and my body would just seem to sigh with relief and energy.
The nausea tide began to turn right around the text-book time of twelve weeks; just when I had all my back-up snack stashes in the car and prepared foods filling my fridge and my constant eating habits steadily down. Having gained nothing previously, I gained four pounds in two weeks, and my thighs and breasts plumped out in a hurry. The fatigue ebbed as well and the early pregnancy fog lifted leaving me flabby from no exercise but thrilled to be moving forward.
I have a solid appreciation for women, including some of my own friends who suffered endless weeks or months of far more severe morning sickness. What brave women, I salute you!
My desire to cook is back full force, last week I prepared my first Beef Wellington, in fact I cooked all day and wasn’t sick once! I am ridiculously optimistic about the rest of this pregnancy but hey, I’ve been wrong before…
I just bought Trim Healthy Mamas (per your recommendation) and can’t wait to read it! I think this is all just very beautiful. A mother in her raw efforts to always do her very best for and by her children… and the battle between also being human and being flawed and having our plants thwarted.
You’re a true gem.
Thanks so much Gretchen! It has been a battle, but I have been trying to give myself grace…I think just the relief of occasionally “letting go” might do as much for my health as superfoods:)
So interesting! I’m so glad you’re feeling better! This is a good reminder for me to not feel crushed if unrealistic expectations are not met, even though I am not by any means in the “purist category”. Lol. Can’t wait to hear more about how your “THM Pregancy” goes! 🙂
I do hope to do a total of three “trimester” posts…it’s always a such a journey, everything seems like a hothouse of emotions, body changes, and responses during pregnancy. I am thankful for every scrap of knowledge I’ve learned along the way and hope to continue to grow…support from friends such as yourself is absolutely key too! 🙂
Anna! You truly have such a beautiful body. I’m looking forward to the next trimester post 🙂
Wow, thanks! That’s a happy comment to wake up to!
I can relate to this! I too had to eat *constantly* throughout the first trimester to help the nausea, and yet food was never, ever appealing. Ugh. I remember making almost daily treks to Whole Foods at lunchtime, searching, searching for something–anything!–that I felt like I could eat and keep down. My food ideals went out the window pretty fast. These memories terrify me when I consider getting pregnant again. It’s good to read your second trimester post too and remember, oh yeah, I did feel good later! I worked out, I ate well,I enjoyed life again. The abject misery is only temporary.
Best wishes to you!
Alison….thank you so much:) Yes, it’s been a lesson in compassion as well for the tough state of some first tri mamas, now I am in the bulging, panting third trimester and feeling like this pregnancy will never end…but just as the first trimester DID end, I should remind myself that I am in the “home strect” and I will never regret a minute growing this longed for babe!